Pages

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Take it from them...

...because black women find love, too!

Today, it's about Tiffany M.


Wedding anniversary date: June 27, 2009

How did you know Marty was the One?
For about the first year or two that Marty and I dated, everything was nearly perfect. That whole "can't eat/can't sleep" cliche is oh-so-true when you're in love. I wanted to spend every single second of my free time with him and vice versa. I just hated when I wasn't with him. And when we were together, it was pure magic. I just knew that no one had ever made my heart flutter the way he did. There was no doubt in my mind that he was the right one for me.

What's one thing marriage has taught you?
Wow, just one? Communication is the first thing that comes to mind because it's such an important factor in a happy and successful marriage. Marty and I are both quiet-natured people. This makes it difficult in times of disagreement because both of us tend to close ourselves off from one another. I think too many people don't realize that marriage takes WORK from BOTH partners. Next to motherhood (I'm not a mother yet; this is just my opinion), marriage is probably the hardest job a person can have. Both parties must put in the effort to make it work. And one of those efforts you have to constantly perfect is communication.

Any advice for the engaged or newlyweds?
Have a marriage plan in place either before getting married or shortly thereafter. Sort out finances, the housework, all the responsibilities of each party. I think this makes it so much easier to know which spouse will be accountable for what early on in the marriage. Will the plan change? Sure it will. But coming to an agreement and setting your expectations now rather than later can save a lot of headaches in the long run.
Another tip I've found helpful is to read marriage advice (self-help) books. I tend to trust some of these more so than information I find on random websites. I read the books, highlight the parts I find most helpful or interesting, and I revisit them when I need a helping hand in my relationship. And if I find something really good, I'll even share it with my husband : o )

Read more about Tiffany & Marty's married life on Tiffany's blog, The Chocolate Knot.


Are you a happily married black woman and want to be featured? Contact me: jamienfleming [at] gmail [dot] com.


1 comment:

J. said...

I think it is interesting that in the last two posts both women have talked about having some type of plan set out. Honestly, I haven't really been thinking of that...I guess my mind is too focused on the wedding and not enough on the marriage!

I think its great that you are doing putting this type of information out there.
:)